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Basic skills to foster good communication:
Practice a psychic pause to allow yourself to think of a response that is not reactive to the situation. This will teach your child to have a more controlled volume of reacting erratic or closed to solutions or thoughts.
Make eye contact but PLEASE do not stare! Find one focal point to glance down at and back up to their eyes. Do not glare at any part of their being. This will keep them from being uncomfortable and less likely to "clam up."
Stop what you are doing and LISTEN! Say "Uh, huh," or nod occasionally to acknowledge you hear them. This shows interest in what they are saying. It is a lot quicker to listen and understand rather than be occupied and appear unconcerned.
Do not interject. If you are seeking clarity, wait until there is a safe break. Sometimes if you listen to everything they have to say, you will get more information than you anticipated. This will teach them to respect the time needed for speaking their issues/concerns , as well as having respect to not interrupt the speaker..
Probably the most important of all: SMILE. When your child says something in which they are excited about or think is amusing, laugh or just smile. Use caution if they are confiding in you for serious, pressing issues. This will teach your child to present themselves in a warm way and be more interactive Cnon-verbally to acknowledge reception of the conversation.
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